10 Simple Steps To Become A Better Wife

Have you ever had one of those days where it seems like your husband is doing EVERYTHING wrong?

Maybe he didn’t react the way you wanted him to when you told him the gossip about your friends or family drama. Maybe you felt like he didn’t kiss you like he meant it when he walked in the door from work. Maybe he didn’t do the dishes exactly how you wanted him to. And of course – maybe he didn’t tell you how AMAZING you looked in your new outfit that you just bought.

I have had days like these. I think as wives, we all have. And if you haven’t had a day like this – it is probably coming. Sometimes as women, we know exactly how we want our husbands to be or react in certain situations. But guess what? Unfortunately, that doesn’t always happen. Men think a lot differently than women and what might be SUPER important to you, may be the LAST thing on his mind.

Often times in marriage, we find our comfort zones. The wife does her thing – the husband does his thing – and everything is fine. BUT – what if you feel like your marriage needs a little spice? What if you feel like your love needs to be rekindled? What if you need something to change because he just isn’t acting exactly the way you want him to?

When this happens, we tend to make a long list of things HE needs to fix. In fact, sometimes the list comes easy. “I want him to compliment me more.” “I want him to kiss me and mean it.” “I want him to say I love you sweeter.”

There is a quote – “If you want something to change, YOU have to do something different.” Notice the word – YOU. It isn’t if you want something to change, SOMEONE ELSE has to do something different or your HUSBAND has to do something different. If YOU want change – YOU be the change.

Many times we want our spouse to change, to make our marriage better. But – It isn’t always up to the men to change. Sometimes the change needs to come from us – the women!

10 SIMPLE STEPS TO BECOME A BETTER WIFE

Photo By Ms. Wedding Image

Here are 10 Simple Steps To Become A Better Wife – to help your marriage grow stronger and for you to see that change you are needing.

1. SET YOUR PRIORITIES: And set them correctly. Above all, your husband should be your number one priority. Our lives are super busy as women, but make sure you set some time every single day to spend with your man.

2. BE INTERESTED IN HIS INTERESTS: Make a list of things that you know he LOVES to do and jump in it with him. If he likes to play basketball – go shoot some hoops with him. If he likes to work out – go to the gym or go on a run with him. He will LOVE that you love what he loves.

3. TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF: In order to take care of another person {your husband}, you MUST take care of yourself. Set goals for yourself. Take a shower or warm bath. Eat healthy and exercise. Do something that makes you laugh every single day. When we take care of ourselves, we are happier, which in return reflects on how we treat our men.

4. SHOW APPRECIATION: You will be surprised how much of a change can come, by just saying “thank you.” Show him that you appreciate what he does on a daily basis. Show him that you are grateful that he works hard to provide for your family. Let him know that you are proud of him for everything he does.

5. PLAN A ROMANTIC SURPRISE: Get a babysitter and surprise him! Make sure the romance doesn’t die in your relationship. Everyone loves to feel loved. Show him that by taking him on a romantic evening, just the two of you.

6. LET HIM HAVE “GUY TIME” : Sometimes guys just need to be GUYS! They need to play those video games and get their workout on. They need to hang with the buddies and go play sports. If we are too controlling and don’t let them have their “them” time – they will be unhappy. Use that time for yourself too! While he does his guy thing, you go do a girl thing! That is a great time to do something you love too – it is a win win!

7. TELL HIM HIS STRENGTHS: Every guys wants to be complimented. Tell him what he is good at and how great he looks. Boost his little ego some more – that’s what a wife is for!

8. BE HIS TROPHY WIFE: Look good for him! This is another thing we tend to get “comfortable” with – our appearance. I am not saying you have to look flawless and fancy when he walks in the door every day. By all means – sometimes I look a LITTLE homeless by the time he comes home. 🙂 But dress up when you go out. Touch up your make-up and look presentable for him every now and then, when he walks in the door. Make him feel PROUD that YOU are his wife and that he gets to come home to you every day.

9. PRAY FOR HIM: A couple that prays together, stays together. Take a few moments every day and pray for him. You can pray for him quietly in your heart or out loud as a couple so he can hear you. He will love to hear your concern for him and that you truly want to be the best wife for him.

10. BE HAPPY: When he walks in the door tonight, have a smile on your face. Instead of having a laundry list of things for him to do – be happy and positive. Nobody wants to come home to someone who is miserable – be enthusiastic and make him smile EVERY day.

if you want something to change, you have to do something different

Often times as we focus on our marriages and do these simple steps for our husbands, they will catch on and reciprocate. If you let him have “guy time” maybe he will let you have more “girl time.” If you point out his strengths, he will probably start pointing out yours too. If you are happy, he will most likely be happy as well!

Let us, as women, take a stand in our marriage and BE the change! As you work on these simple steps to become a better wife – I know your love will increase for that man by your side and the love will be reciprocated.

What do you like to do for your husband? I would love to hear from you!

You may also like Seven Secrets To A Happy Marriage, 10 Things Your Wife Needs From You  and Things Your Husband is Waiting To Hear.

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11 Comments on 10 Simple Steps To Become A Better Wife

  1. kim
    May 25, 2017 at 3:57 pm (7 years ago)

    Hey Danielle, loved your post!

    It inspired me to write my own version: http://www.marriagezing.com/how-to-be-a-better-wife/

    Check it out, might be worth a mention on your blog 😉

    Either way, keep up the great work! Love all that you’re doing here

    xoxo
    Kim

    Reply
  2. Ashley H
    November 4, 2016 at 9:18 pm (7 years ago)

    I love this article!! My Babe and I were starting to fight a lot and stay super cranky even into the night, always complaining about what the other didn’t do enough in the house and relationship; Well I once read what you put about if you want to see change then be the change first. That is such a great saying for life in general, i can see how it would most def apply to relationships; I read this a couple weeks ago and started each step slowly everyday and it made such a huge difference. We are nicer and enjoy spending more time together, and I even get asked by text every morning what I would like to do with him later that evening. It’s like everyday is our personal date night. Thanks so much for these amazing tips!

    Reply
  3. Diana
    December 22, 2015 at 1:58 am (8 years ago)

    I laughed hard at your mention of looking a little less homeless when your husband comes home. Reminds me of how crazy my hair looks right now and my husband is seated at the desk across from mine.

    Reply
  4. Sheila
    April 10, 2015 at 12:26 am (9 years ago)

    I agree with your stance on taking responsibility. However, I do all these things and it makes no difference in my husband. And I’m not being obtuse. I really do these things. It’s very disheartening and so yes, I think he needs to step up to the plate and do something different. I sent him the article on the tips for men. Hopefully he will read it and something will sink in…

    Reply
  5. Tammi
    November 19, 2014 at 4:09 pm (9 years ago)

    This is really a nice post. But I would like to suggest that number 1 should be putting God first. We should love God more than our and our husbands, and our husbands should love God more than they love us. He is the most important thing to keep a marriage happy, then the rest falls into place. Otherwise, spot on!

    Reply
    • Litoy Paras
      July 29, 2015 at 9:35 pm (9 years ago)

      Amen to this. This is very good comment. Putting God first, +AMDG+

      Reply
  6. Janelle@The Peaceful Haven
    August 11, 2014 at 9:37 pm (10 years ago)

    What a wonderful post! I have been married 25 years and I agree with what you wrote. Thanks for putting the word out there!

    Reply
  7. Annette Belnap
    August 7, 2014 at 5:10 pm (10 years ago)

    Great ideas. Especially letting him have is guy time. My sisters don’t understand why I “let” my husband paraglide. Why would I not let him do what he wants, he lets me do what I want!

    Reply
  8. Jenna @ A Savory Feast
    August 7, 2014 at 4:34 pm (10 years ago)

    These are great tips for me to start working on even while I’m dating. Thanks!

    Reply
  9. katy
    August 7, 2014 at 2:27 pm (10 years ago)

    And this is why I LOVE your blog!! I am going to make sure I smile when he comes home tonight. xx

    Reply
  10. Britney @ The Princess & Her Cowboys
    August 7, 2014 at 5:07 am (10 years ago)

    Some awesome ideas! I could use a little work on the looking good. Sometimes I’m still in pi’s when he gets home….

    Reply

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