I am way excited to share with you a guest post by husband today! As many of you know, we met when we were 15, started dating when we were 16, married at 21 and have now been married for over 5 years! I just love him and am so happy that he is my bestie forever!
I was thinking the other day about us, women. All too often, we wonder what in the world our husbands are thinking. Do you agree? So I thought I would ask my husband what his thoughts were on the issue. I present to you, 5 THINGS YOUR HUSBAND WISHES YOU KNEW by Tyson Davis.
It’s a universal truth that men and women are different. We eat, sleep, think and do pretty much everything differently. For every husband out there that has been given a stern talking to for spending too much time watching sports, there is a woman who has had to defend why she just had to have that perfect pair of shoes. True, those are general stereotypes that don’t apply to every case but what is important is that in marriage, husbands and wives think differently.
Years ago there was a movie that came out that was popular that highlighted a man who could hear what women were thinking. In the movie the main character, we’ll call him Mel Gibson, is your typical chauvinistic male that treats all women negatively. As the movie progresses and he is able to learn more and more about how women actually think he evolves into a much more sensitive, understanding and overall better man. I enjoyed this movie and I think my marriage is better off because I learned from it that every day life is different from my wife’s point of view. Though we both get up every day the same, we see the world through different lenses. At the beginning stages of our marriage I struggled understanding this and looking back I wish I could have had a chat with my younger self. I would teach young me that my wife’s behavior resulted from her hard wiring. As naive as I was, I didn’t grasp early on that because my wife is a girl, she thinks and acts differently than me. Many “marital discussions” would have been avoided had I just known what and how she was thinking. With a few more years of experience now I am definitely getting better but still am learning how to more effectively communicate with my wife.
Have you ever felt the way I did? Have you ever been in fight with your spouse and said to yourself, “how could he be so stubborn?” “sometimes I just don’t know what you’re thinking.” I am sure many wives throughout the world have to some degree wondered what in the world is going on in their husbands’ heads. I offer to you 5 important points that your husband wishes you knew.
5. Confidence is Sexier than Lingerie: Your husband loves when you are strong and independent. That can sometimes be taken to an unnecessary extreme but overall your husband is proud of you when you can hold the house down. When he leaves for work, he can be confident in knowing that you know you can tackle anything that comes your way. Sometimes he will enjoy being your knight in shining armor and coming in to save the day but he will always love when you can stand on your own two feet and be a great example of a hard worker for your children.
4. Health is Always Important: Remember back when you were dating and you did everything you could in order to make yourself visually appealing to the potential suitor who is now the guy you wake up to every morning? All of that stuff is still important to your husband today. I am not saying that every husband wants their wife to look like a super model. What I am saying though is that it is very important that a man knows that his wife is making a conscious effort to take care of herself.
3. Mutual Respect is Essential to Happiness: I was taught growing up that the most important thing needed in every successful relationship is respect. Many times a husband spends many hours trying to provide for the family that you and him have created. That brings a bit of stress to his life just as much as taking care of 4 kids under the age of 5 has brought to yours. When talking together, avoid words that belittle his efforts to work hard for your family. Show him the respect that he needs and your every wish will be his command.
2. He is a Simple Creature With Simple Needs: The big dinner with candles and roasted duck is nice once a year but generally men are simple creatures. Going the extra mile for date night is fun every once in a while but don’t feel the need to do it all the time. Your husband is as happy a clam just sitting with a pizza and a ball game. Movie night in with sweats is just as much fun to him as a big expensive dinner with more forks than he knows what to do with.
1. He Loves You: An important phrase I heard once was that love is not a noun, love is a verb. It is showed in many way shapes and forms. It is important to find out how your husband shows love and how he perceives love. Remember your husband married you because he wants to be with you forever. He is always going to do and say things with the best intentions. I am sure you can remember a time when you just thought to yourself sarcastically “he always just knows how to say the right thing” even though it’s exactly the opposite of what you wanted to hear. See beyond his words and actions and know that ultimately he loves you and is trying his best to show that to you every day.
This list could go on much longer but hopefully the 5 highlighted items here give you a little insight into your husbands world as he sees it. A good strong marriage is something that has become harder to find these days. It takes two people who are both willing to compromise and grow together. Your husband hasn’t reached perfection even if he thinks he has. Keep working with him as you both strive to build a relationship that will last forever. Remember that he loves you and that the best way to show him you love him too is to understand him.
Do you have a way that you show your love towards your husband? Share in the comment section below how you work to build a marriage that lasts forever.
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